"Since the passage of Prop 8, I have lost interest or faith in any effort to gain marriage rights state by state. I am convinced, as are a number of my activist friends, that the best place for us to put our energy is in reforming DOMA. President Obama clearly stated on his website, before the election that he would amend DOMA to give all recognized unions federal rights. This is what we need, this will make the difference for all gays and lesbians in all 50 states. I've decided not to give a penny more or a minute more of my time to any organization that doesn't make this their priority. We have sponsors in the House and Senate and a president that will sign. This MUST be done before mid-term elections or we risk a backlash vote that destroys our majority vote in Congress. I urge you to put the reform of DOMA at the very top of your to-do list. That's where it's at - that's where I'm at! - Queenralph"

"Why have you and your friends come to this conclusion, queenralph?

I tend to lean against federal efforts and toward state-by-state efforts because I think the changes in laws and attitudes will be more lasting. Who's to say if DOMA is repealed, it can't be passed again in one fell swoop? However I think President Obama's campaign pledges around the Defense of Marriage Act are encouraging. I favor going after opportunities like this. I would point out there are also opportunities state-by-state."